Sunday, August 19, 2007

Inside Kids vs. Outside Kids


The hot days of summer have brought about a horrifying realization. My kids are "screen potato inside kids". All activities revolve around a screen,T.V. screen, computer screen, tiny phone screen.

Being a teacher, means that I am home with my beautiful, wonderful, children most of the summer. AAAAAHHHHH! Now, I must preface this with the fact that I have two shifts of children. I have four adolescents/teenagers , my 12 and 15 year old plus my "bonus" children, aged 11 and 15. All together, two boys and two girls right smack in the middle of "moody, obnoxious, leave me alone, rolling eyes, sucking teeth, why not, can I have, this is so boring" pleasure years.

But wait, the second shift. I have 2 year old fraternal twins. Girls.

So it is 5 pm and inside it is an oven. "Take the twins outside, I will be out in a minute" , I say as I try to finish "SOMETHING"! You know, laundry, dinner, bills, a book, I am just trying to have a few moments during that "golden time of day" also known as the cranky, screaming, restless can't wait until 9:00 time of day.

I hear four groans.

Okay, "let's walk to the store for ice cream!" I say.

That is sure to get a more positive response. It does. "I'll go" , "Me, too" times 2.

The twins are game. "yets go mommy!" They cant' wait to get outside for ANYTHING.

As we are walking, I can't help but notice the many children on bikes, rollerblades or walking and socializing in our neighborhood. "What's up with that?", I think.

My screen potato daughter informs me that outside kids are grungy. "Excuse me?!" my socially correct, mom-self retorts.

"I'm sorry mom. Outside kids are grungy looking."

Of course, I am becoming more indignant by the second.

" We've just got more to do inside than sweat out our hair, my daughter says," You know, text, IM, watch 'High School Musical 2".

As I watch the "outside children" skate or ride down the street hair flying, pants torn, skates too big, I cant help but think that my kids are missing out on an important part of their childhood.

Now, mind you, when I was growing up, I was an inside kid without a choice. My mama MADE US go outside.

"Get on outside NOW!" , my mama would say, "And don't be coming in here bringing flies" That meant STAY OUTSIDE! No in and out.

Of course we didn't have cell phones, computers and WII. We also didn't have television with five thousand, two hundred and forty five stations.

As a parent, I envy the "outside kids" . They seem to be the ones really living. They are riding bikes, playing basketball and jumping double-dutch. I have to beg my children to go outside, even if their 2 year old sisters, love outside.

What did I do wrong. I was determined to raise, well balanced, adventurous, happy children. Not, " I'm watching a re-rerun of Zach and Cody" kids.

I am not trying to put a value on this. Parenting is hard work. Parenting requires consistency, intensity and committment, that sometimes is just plain exhausting. This doesn't mean that you are a bad parent, or that a value can be placed on what each person does as an individual, inside or outside.

However. as the twins long to "go on the gwass", I recognize my responsibility to take them there. I want them to have the desire, ability and confidence to go skating or riding about the neighborhood during the hot days of summer or whenever they want. I have a new chance with the twins, to break the habit of my other beautiful, intelligent children of thinkging that the most valuable expriences occur inside. Clearly, messed up hair and torn pants are a part of chiildhood that once past are hard to regain.

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

My sister and I were definitely "outside kids". It went without saying. Get up.Make beds. Chores. GET OUT! The only exception was Saturday morning. We got to watch "Soul Train" while doing our chores THEN we went outside. Our backyard was made for the summertime. We had a large "Doll House", a swing on the avocado tree, a basketball court, ping pong table, and picnic benches. My dad worked for Arden Farms (Knudsen after it was sold) and we had our own ice cream freezer in the garage. There was no need to run to the ice cream truck...ALL the kids in the neighbborhood knew where the latest bomb pop, eskimo pie, strawberry shortcake, or big stick was and where to get it. For FREE. He worked hard at his job, but worked even harder to make our backyard a place to be proud of.

We had talent shows, secret clubs, ping-pong tournaments (of which I'm still the QUEEN), first kisses, first feels, fights, and my mouth was washed out with "safeguard" soap (in front of EVERYBODY) when my mother heard me say "shit" one day while she was on the backporch doing laundry.

Those were the days. Today we have to be concerned with smaller spaces, pedophiles, gangs, innocent bystander drive-by's, etc...
I think there's a 4 bedroom- 3 bath, 2 story home in the ATL with an acre or more calling our name in the next few years!

Lydia said...

Wow! That is the kind of backyard I dream of for my kids, and ME! I didn't know you were the queen of pin-pong?! I have been threatening to get a ping-pong table, but afraid it would just collect leaves, cats etc.

Atlanta, New Orleans, The Carolinas? somewhere huh?!

Loved reading your comment!

Valley Girl said...

Great post! I was born an "inside kid" who was urged to come outside by my "outdoor kid" neighbor. I am so glad I met her. We had wonderful afternoons playing in the field, swinging on her tree swing, doing cartwheels in the sprinklers. No childhood is complete without enjoying what it is to get your hands dirty, your clothes wrinkly, your hair messy, and it being o.k. (because that's the last time in your life that it will be o.k.!).

Lydia said...

Valley Girl,

I agree with you totally. I don't know about your childhood and neighborhood, but mine was a different experience than my childrens. We knew EVERY family on our block and every parent was every childs parent.

It's sad but I know the names of 1 family on my block. It is just not the 'neighborhood' vibe of my day. Of course, I could change that for my kids sake! My teens are little old for the change, but my 2 year olds do like getting their "hands dirty and clothes wrinkly".So I guess I have earned another chance!

Anonymous said...

My kids are outdoor kids- they come home from school and don their Puddlegear (raingear) and go go go. In the last week they have invented sling shot games on the tramp- road wake boarding (riding bikes top speed towing someone else on a skateboard or other wheeled implement! they are trying to figure out how to get down the block without touching the ground- roof to fence to roof...and there are 10 kids in the neighbourhood group. Wonderful-
Half the battle was the raingear- Puddlegear.com

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